Mothership Confessional

Holy cow, baby boy! Another month gone!! Liam is crawling. Standing. Shifting weight on his legs. Things have changed a lot this month! Bath night has gotten complicated again. Liam is so squirmy in his bath sling so I've been working on a safer solution for him. We have a textured bathtub so unfortunately a bath mat doesn't stick to it, so I had to brainstorm a bit to keep Liam stable while sister sloshes in the tub next to him! When I get them out of the tub, they scatter! It's a race to get them dried off and diapered before they start peeing everywhere! Ok, it's not as dramatic as it sounds but I always feel so rushed to get their tushies covered! Ava has been experimenting with Liam a bit. I have caught her pushing him over when he's sitting. And it's not because she's upset with him, I think she is literally just exploring cause and effect. And then as soon as he falls over and cries, of course I come over to comfort him and pick him up, and ...

My feelings on this topic were taking over Liam's 9 month post for tomorrow, and I wasn't liking the direction the post was going. So I decided to give those thoughts their own space. I had hopes of being uber organized and busy and distracted to keep my mind off of Chris being gone. And those are still aspirations of mine, but it is SO MUCH HARDER than I thought it would be. I'm realizing the biggest struggle is NOT going to the grocery store alone all the time. It is NOT cleaning the house by myself. It is NOT figuring out who is going to help me with car maintenance or lawncare or baby gate installation or a broken closet door or toilet repair or smoke detector battery replacement on 9-foot ceilings. The biggest struggle is my emotions. More specifically, my emotionl "tank", if you will. I feel so emotionally drained a lot of the time. Trying to keep my poker face with the kids when I'm feeling sad/overwhelemed/frustrated. Making sure the kids get w...

How can this be??? 8 months seems so "old"! My tiny baby boy is growing fast! I would like to start this post by saying DEPLOYMENTS SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK The distraction of learning to juggle life without Chris here has kind of worn off now that it's the new normal, and it has completely worn me down. Kind of like the feeling you get after the adrenaline has worn off - I'm pooped. My to-do list just gets longer and longer since it takes me so long to get things accomplished. Now I just feel lonely. It doesn't matter how many things I pack into my day, how many places we go, or how many people we see. It doesn't change the fact that he is gone. The house is really quiet at night. It's no fun to watch tv night after night after night after night without him. Eating all of my meals alone (or with messy children alone). We are approaching the holiday season and I'm already sad he's not going to be here for any of it. It makes me the most sad that he...

Welcome to my Let's Play! series!! My first "official" post is going to be kind of a summary on my feelings on why telling your child "Let's Play!" is so important! So what is "play" and why is it so important, anyway? Playtime for kids is a HOT topic lately. There are some big stories floating around about it - have you seen the one about schools that are doubling/tripling recess times and seeing improvements in students' work because of it? Playtime for our kids is complete freedom.  Open-ended activites where they can make their own choices and interact with their peers under their own choosing. Playtime is where children's minds can rehearse favorite activites, explore new possibilites, and foster friendships and find commonalities with peers. It's a lot of self-discovery and learning about their environment! It's where they explore "what happens if..." and learn the positive and negative consequences of th...

It's been one month since Chris has been gone. I've been thinking about this post for awhile, but I'm finding that it's really hard to put this last month into words. It is nonstop crazy, as you would assume with 2 kids still in diapers. It is pretty much nonstop selflessness. There are moments of calm and control, which are so, so great. I'm learning to appreciate those moments more and more! Most days I can stay positive. And some days the frustration rises and something as simple as trying to buckle the carseat but Liam wont let go of the straps makes me have to step back, breathe, and count to 10 to keep my cool. Sometimes it's when the 4th piece of food falls from chubby little fingers and splatters on the floor. Sometimes it's when Ava shrieks at the top of her lungs for the 15th time in a row. Sometimes it's when we are all packed up and ready to load up in the car and I realize someone needs a diaper change. Or a snack. Or a toy...

You know, it's really hard to find toys for the child who falls between baby toys that light up and twinkle, and little doll playsets and Legos. What about that 2 year old who isn't a baby anymore but isn't ready for "big kid" toys? Toddlers. Have you met a toddler?! They change their minds constantly  and can be quite destructive! I always struggle with "do I buy Ava cheap toys so if/when she destroys it, it's not a big deal" or "do I buy more expensive, quality toys that will last but risk wasting money if she plays with it twice and decides she doesn't like it". I figured I can't be the only parent who feels this way! We all want our kids to have meaningful experiences with their toys. I'm always on the hunt for just the right toys  that have educational value while also maintaining the feeling of "fun". And especially for that tricky 2 year old...most toys say 3+  or 5+  because they co...

So I haven't done one of these posts in a long  time because life got a little crazy! And it still is - but I was feeling like I needed to do something Ava-focused that is new and exciting for her! I've always wanted to make sensory bins for her, but I've been waiting for her to pass the phase where she puts everything in her mouth. The last time I tried this activity with her I was about 20 weeks pregnant with Liam and Ava was around 15 months old, and she would take fist fulls of rice and shove it in her mouth at our playgroup!! So now that she is 2, I feel that she is ready to try it again! I used to make Toddler Sensory Bags for her since she clearly wasn't ready for an open bin! I went to Walmart this morning and bought a big bag of the cheapest rice, cheapest dry beans, and I picked 2 fun items to go into the sensory bins. I chose a variety pack of pom poms (because she loves playing with cotton balls) and a little packet of plastic gems (because...